Saturday, January 14, 2012

My Grandma Passed Away

In 2002, I met my grandma for the very first time. She lives {or is it lived now?} in Ghana, Africa so my sisters and my parents visited for a month trip.

At that time, I wasn't a picture taking crazy. Oh, how I wish I was. I wish I could share a picture of the beautiful woman that she was.

Since we {my sisters and I} don't speak the language fluently everything we said to our grandma had to be translated. That really stunk. It made it harder to connect. But she was such a lovely little lady. Reminded me so much of my mom.

When I spoke to my mom after my grandma's passing, she was strong. She said that grandma is with the Lord but I could hear that her voice was about to break. And then we cried. I cried for my mother. I cried because I wasn't crying because my grandma died but because my mom was sad. I feel horrible that I didn't really know my grandma. I feel horrible that I don't know my extended family. I feel horrible that I can never truly feel the pain that my parents feel when a family member passes away because I don't know them.

That is the saddest part about being born here and my extended family still in Africa. We don't know them. So we can never feel the pain our parents feel.

It got me thinking about how much I want my future kids to know my parents. I want them to cry with me because they feel the pain too and not just because I am sad. I want them to remember all the great things my parents did for them and all the memories they shared. Because if I could, I know that I would feel like a better daughter at this time. I would feel that my mom knows that I know what she is going through because I feel the pain too.

Please pray for my mom. Please pray that God gives her the strength to go through this difficult time because all her siblings that feel her exact pain are thousand and thousands miles away.

49 comments:

Marie said...

Faith, I'm so sorry. Big virtual hugs to both you and your mom.

LESAPEA MUSINGS said...

My deepest sympathy Faith. I know the memories of your wonderful Grandma will bear both of you and your Mom through this time of sadness.

Lisa x

Nancy said...

PRAYING for your Mom & that you can comfort her the way you want to & the way she needs.
Hugs to all of you. I'm so sorry for the loss in your family.

Chrissy + Nate said...

I'm so so sorry, Faith. Will be thinking and lifting up prayers for you, your mom, and your family.

*~Sarah Lynn~* said...

So very sorry for your family dear.

Melissa said...

I'm so sorry for your family's loss :(

My mom's parents died well before I was born, but according to her, they would have been very involved, awesome grandparents. I knew my dad's father decently well, but I never really knew his mother. She abandoned her kids when they were little when she divorced from my grandfather. She came and went into her kids' lives when they were adults and I met her a hand full of times. I was told by my parents that I had to invite her to my wedding, and she said she'd come if nothing else was going on! Anyway, she passed away in May of last year I think, and I felt bad for my dad because he was upset, but I didn't really feel sad because I barely knew her. The kicker is she lived in the same state as me and CT is not big. She could have known us, your grandmother lived so far away. I'm sorry you didn't get to know her too well and that you don't see your extended family much. I agree that it's really important for kids to know their grandparents. Landon has 5 because Jeff's dad remarried and I think he's so lucky and has it very different than I did.

Tenecia said...

Sending you a huge hug and praying that God surround you & your family with his love and comfort.

T.

MellyB said...

I'm so sorry Faith. I'm sorry the massive distance prevented you you from having the relationship you would have liked and I'm so sorry for your Mom.

Sending many prayers your families way.

Dani @ OK, Dani said...

Awwww Faithyboo I'm so so sorry about your family's loss. I'm sure your mom is super strong and will heal well from this painful blow. Sending lots of love your family's way!!!

CC [AKA Frugalista] said...

I know exactly how you feel. I don't know my extended family. When they die I'm sad for my parents but I don't really know them. They don't live out of country just out of state but that's just the way it's been. So sorry for your family's loss.

Mrs. Pancakes said...

Sorry for your loss Faith! Relationships with grandparents are do vital. Sending prayers out to your mom! These things are never easy!!

Ashley @ stinkandschmoop.blogspot.com said...

So sorry to hear about the loss of your grandmother Faith.

Thinking of you and yourfamily <3

Carlie said...

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Your mom, her family, and you will be in my prayers!

Mari said...

Oh my God, Faith. I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers! Be strong, girl!

Lil' Woman said...

I'm so sorry Faith.
I will be keeping you and your family in my prayers!

Pegster said...

I am so sorry for your family's loss Faith. I will keep you guys in my prayers.

Nicole said...

I am so sorry honey. You are in my prayers. Feel better

www.nmephotoblog.blogspot.com

Mrs. H said...

Oh hon, I'm so sorry for your loss. You're in my thoughts and prayers. {hugs}

Megan said...

Oh, Faith, I'm so sorry! I'll be praying for you and your mom!!

Tiffany said...

My sincere condolences. Your family is in my prayers.

PhenomenallyMe said...

I'm praying for you and your family! Sorry for your loss! I know that God is with all of you!

Rocker Chic said...

Faith,

I am sorry for your loss. Your family will be in my prayers.

Heather said...

I'd like to extend my deepest sympathy to you and your entire family. Praying for you and your family to find peace.

Valerie Griffin said...

Sorry sweet girl..I'll be praying for your family.

Jessica Renee said...

Thinking of you and your family, I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. I lost my grandma last May and I wasn't close to her either (a language barrier didn't help there either) and it was hard seeing my dad and his family so hurt and sad but not really understanding that same feeling. I know your mom's just glad to have your support through this time.

Carolyn said...

I'm sorry hon! :( I'm thinking about you and your family today!!

Tami-scramble said...

I'm so sorry Faith. Try not to look at it as a regret that you didn't know your grandmother well. Rather you knew her through your mom. And that, is very special. xoxo

Heather said...

I am so sorry and will certainly keep you, your mom and your family in my thoughts. Sending hugs your way!

ruthy ann said...

i totally know how you feel...my mothers parents were in Korea...I didn't know them, and it was difficult to learn they had passed for my mother. Sending prayers your family's way faith!

The New Mrs. B. said...

you and your family our in my prayers!

Morgan said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. She is in a better place, but it's definitely going to take time for your mom to heal. You all will be in my prayers.

Dana said...

Internet hugs. May the peace of God be with you and your family.

integratedmemoirs said...

I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Monique said...

So sorry to hear about your grandma will certainly keep your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Rod and Alex - aka: "Rolex" said...

I am so sorry for your family's loss. I am certainly praying for your mom at this extremely difficult time.

Jemima said...

Oh dear, i am so sorry for the loss of your grandma, i love my grandma to bits so i can certainly relate to your sense of loss and especially your mom's pain...may the God of all comfort be with you and your family..amen

jacin {lovely little details} said...

oh no i'm so sorry faith. please know my thoughts are with you and your family.

Johnna said...

I am so so sorry for your loss Faith. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Mandy Bogdan said...

Keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers! Sending hugs and kisses your way!

Ms. Geek Goddess said...

Hey Faith,

Sorry so late on this one. I am very sorry to hear about the passing of your grandmother! I will be praying for you and your family. I know that it must really be hard and I am not trying to tell you how to feel, but it is not really your fault that you did not know her the way you may have wished and so you should not beat yourself up too much. I understand you wanting to share a connection with your mom though. I think the last paragraph of this post sums it up. Life is so funny in the way that things work out. Situations come along that we have little or no control over, but the key is to reflect on it and try to make a better future from it. I have this motto for my life about not letting the pain be in vain. All of the things that trouble and hurt me... I am trying to find a positive way to bring it all together so that my sorrows are not in vain. It sounds like this is what you are going to do with your future family. Keep your head up pretty lady and know that your bloggy buds will be keeping you in our hearts and in our prayers! (((HUGS))) :)

Bruleegirl said...

I am so sorry for your loss.. Prayers for you and your family

Alida said...

Faith, I am so sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you and your family.

blessings to you, dear one<3
Alida

Ashley said...

oh, faith...i'm just now catching up on blogs and reading this post. i am sooo sorry for the lost of your grandmother. i will certainly keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

my moms from panama, so most of her family is still in central america. i've only been there twice and often times i wish i knew more about my family there. i completely understand what you mean about wanting to know your family.

be strong baby girl. sending hugs your way!

Sunkissed and Southern said...

im so sorry faith. im just catching up as well. you and your momma will be in my prayers.

Mort said...

I'm very sorry for your loss Faith. My thoughts are with you and your family during this time.
I hope that you and your family can just think of the happy times and the memories you got to share with each other, to ease some of the pain.
Try to celebrate your Grandma in the best way you know how. Or the way that your mom remembers her.

Nellie said...

So so sorry for your loss, I know how hard it is to watch a parent mourn their parent. It is possibly the hardest thing to witness!

Be Inspired said...

Faith I know I am a little behind on this post. Playing catch up with my blog reads.

I am so sorry to hear about your Grandmother. I will add you and your family to my prayer list. Sending you BIG HUGS!

Desi said...

Sorry to hear about your grandma's passing. I think you are amazing because you are crying for your mother. It says something about a person who can empathize with another and truly feel pain because they are feeling pain. Even though you didn't feel close to your gma, it's enough that you are there for your mama during this time. Keeping you in my thoughts, Faith!

Nic A said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandma, Faith. I will definitely keep you and your family in my prayers. Don't worry about not being a good daughter. You are an amazing person and your mom knows it! Miss you