Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Mother's Day without mom.

This will be my second year without my mom on Mother’s Day. It is strange because before my mom passed away I never really gave much thought about how hard this occasion is for those without moms/dads. I cared but it was fleeting and not personal. Now, I know and I’m disappointed in myself that I didn’t take the time to really think about how hard this day is for so many people.

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Anytime I see the picture below I smile.
Although my niece is crying for the balloon (give her the balloon Maryanna!) the joy in my mom's face means the world to me.
She was truly happy.

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For weeks leading up to Mother’s Day, it is all in your face, a constant reminder. The commercials, Instagram, blog posts, etc. Everyone talking about their mom and each time my eyes tear up. It is a hard pill to swallow that you no longer have a mom and the weeks leading up to Mother's Day, you’re reminded of it daily.

I’m not saying that I don’t want people to talk about Mother’s Day or their amazing mothers. Mothers are so important and deserve every acknowledgment; I just wish that I was also partaking in the celebration.

We’re heading to my mom’s grave for Mother’s Day and I'll bring flowers in her favorite color. I intend to talk to her as though she were sitting right besides me. I miss my mom. So, so much. I’m glad that I kept so many of her voicemails well before she got sick because they truly are getting me through so many holidays. Why I kept a 2012 birthday voice message from my mom is beyond me but I'm so glad I did because every birthday I can pretend that she called and left me a message.

Hug your mother. Hug her tight. Call her often and let her know how much you love her. I really wish I could. And for all the mothers out there, we see what you're doing. You are amazing and you're doing just fine.

9 comments:

Highly Favored said...

Your Moms smile is so bright and beautiful. So happy that you have her voice captured and that you have these memories in pictures. May God comfort your heart during this season and beyond.

Thank you for this reminder to cherish our Mothers while they are with us.

Emily Jane said...

Your mom is beautiful. I love that you kept voice-mails from her so you can still hear her voice <3. I'm sorry this day is so difficult for you and your family (and probably all holidays). I love you Faith.

Nylse Esahc said...

This will be my first mothers day without my mom; I'm not going to the cemetery.
She left messages for me on my phone also and I still have the one from my anniversary in March which I play when I need a pick me up.

Hugs to you my friend.

Cece @Mahogany Drive said...

I'm sorry it is such a hard day for you. It's true. You are bombarded with it, and you probably don't even realize how much until you don't have your mom. I am sending you so many virtual hugs. I'm glad that you have so many precious memories of her to smile about.

Joy B. E. said...

This just made me tear up. Sending virtual hugs your way. This is certainly a hard pill to swallow.
You got your beautiful smile from your mom. It brightens up the room!

Desiree Macke said...

Your mother was such a beauty.
Lifting prayers for you this weekend.
xo

Law_Fal said...

I dread these occasions as well. The holidays are the hardest times. Hugs and love your way.

southurnprincess.com said...

I cried while reading this. I lost my mom in 2013 and it is still hard to grasp that she is not here. I will keep you and your family up in prayer hun. Huge hugs.

Maureen S. said...

Hug! Beautiful pictures of you all. I read a wonderful post yesterday reminding me of all those grieving on Mother's Day and I so appreciated it. There are so many without moms, women who can't be moms, women who are step-moms and feel a whole other type of pain I never realized, unmarried women who waited too long and are past childbearing age, and moms who are sadly estranged from their children. Reading the comments of these women showed that these women are not alone in their grief and there is some comfort when pain is shared with others. I hope you had a lot of love surrounding you yesterday and others who could lift you up. I'm praying that I remember to also lift up others and be that friend in their time of need too.