Sunday, August 16, 2015

August 8th.

Although, everyone is aware that death is a part of life and that we all will die, it does not make it hurt any less.

When we learned my mom had cancer last July we had hope that she was going to beat it. That God was going to heal her. On August 8th, we had no choice but to accept that God needed her more. It hurts that He did not find it fit for her to stay a little longer with us. I want her with us so badly it hurts every part of my body.

It is hard to come to terms that she is no longer with us.
My mom, my favorite lady in the entire world is no longer here.
That hurts so much.

She was not only incredible to her family but to so many people. At her funeral it was no surprise that there were over 500 people who came to pay their respects. In fact, our funeral director said that he had never seen as many people at the cemetery as he had on Friday. But everyone wanted to thank my mom for what she had done in their lives.

Although I was aware that my mom had made an impact on so many lives, I really didn't know to the extent until the many stories were shared. Honestly, I was not surprised by what I heard but I was blown away. My mom made a difference not only in her children and husband's life but so many others. There was not a dry eye in the house when it was time to say goodbye to my mom. People truly cried and at some points I felt that I needed to comfort others through my own gut-wrenching tears.

But my mom's favorite song was "It Is Well With My Soul" and it truly was. Her body failed her but her soul was in tact so when that song was played and sung I felt like my mom was telling us all to stop crying and rejoice that she was finally where she worked all her life to get to. People commented that my mom had a smile on her face and guys, no lie, she did. She was at peace to finally be able to meet her maker.

Although she leaves many sad hearts behind she leaves such a big legacy that I truly hope that I can be a part of.

My mom was not only a mother & wife but she was a counselor, an encourager, a prayerful woman, lover of all people, teacher, pastor, best cook, dancer and so much more that I'll be here all day if I decided to list it all.

I know that as each day goes on it will become easier and thoughts of my mom won't evoke sadness and tears. I know that one day I'll be able to think of her with the biggest smile on my face and appreciate that although I had her for such a short time, I was so blessed to have her. I had her and I'm so, so grateful.

Mom, I love you and my goal in life is to make you so proud. I want you to know that I am happy you are no longer in pain but that I miss you so, so much. I miss the phone calls, the I love yous and your calming presence. I miss your smile, you had the best smile.

But I'll see that smile when we meet again.


"It Is Well"

Grander earth has quaked before
Moved by the sound of His voice
Seas that are shaken and stirred
Can be calmed and broken for my regard

Through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You
Through it all, through it all
It is well

Through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You
It is well with me

Far be it from me to not believe
Even when my eyes can't see

And this mountain that's in front of me
Will be thrown into the midst of the sea

Through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You
Through it all, through it all
It is well

So let go my soul and trust in Him
The waves and wind still know His name

It is well with my soul
It is well with my soul
It is well with my soul
It is well with my soul
It is well it is well with my soul

Through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You Lord
Through it all, through it all
It is well with me.


Kimberly Landers said...

James 1:13
Rev. 21:4
John 5:28
Isaiah 41:10
Psalm 34:18

Sharon said...

So Sweet. So Sad. Until you meet again....

Nylse Esahc said...

I'm not sure what to say; I am happy your mom is in no more pain and that she left such a vast legacy, yet I am also sad for you. But I know that you do not weep as those that have no hope only because there is truly a void where she was.

I have never seen or heard this version of "It is well" before.

Jasmine Duffy said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. <3

Beauty said...

Oh my; I'm lost for words to read about your loss but I know you will definitely be okay. 'just as you said; your Mom lived an inspiring life and she raised a strong, confident woman like you and she knows that you will be okay.
I pray that God will give you and your siblings and all those who were touched by your Mom, grace to bear her absence.

misskirwan said...

Sorry for your loss

Mrs JK said...

May your mom's beautiful soul rest in peace! And I too believe it is well with her soul (I love that hymn!).

Newy said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I loss my mom in the same way. Cancer sucks. I wanted God to give her more time...I prayed and cried about it, but it wasn't HIS will. Don't let anyone tell you how to grieve or how long to grieve. Just know that time will make it easier to wake up each day. Cry if you want to, scream if you must, reflect always but just know she doesn't want you stuck at August 8, 2015...I am finally becoming unstuck from October 28, 2011. ((hugs))

Kristen said...

While it's comforting to know you will see her again, it's still hard being the one left behind. Praying you will find peace and comfort! Sending many e-hugs your way!

Pegster said...

So sad, she is gone too soon way too soon. Cancer truly sucks. I am so sorry Faith, death is so painful and so final and so ahhhh. I am so sorry for your loss, I don't know if you ever recover from such a loss but I wish you to find peace and comfort in this very difficult time and to all the difficult times that lay ahead. I am so sorry for your loss Faith.

Heather said...

This is a beautiful tribute to your mom, Faith, and a reminder that it's the lives you touch and the difference you make in this world that truly matter. Hugs and love to you and your family.

Law_Fal said...

Praying for your strength love. It's been a gut wrenching summer. Life had thrown so many curve balls. Even though it is the saddest hour, please find comfort in knowing that she will always be with you in spirt. Love you dear. And know I'm here if you ever need anything.

Cece said...

Every time a read a post about your mom I get teary because I can only imagine how hard it must be and I know that it's something that we all have to face some day. It really isn't fair and whether it's sudden or something you are mentally trying to prepare for there is no way to prepare for the pain that you will feel. I am so, so sorry that you and the world lost such a beautiful person.

Desiree Macke said...

Thinking of you and sending hugs, love and prayers.

Carolyn said...

My heart hurts for you. I'm so glad that your mom had so many people there to remember her. Sending hugs!!

Christelle said...

It's no surprise then where such a beautiful soul like you came from. I'm truly sorry for your loss, Faith, I know nothing I can say will make it easier or the hurt disappear, but you are in my thoughts and prayers. She is whole, healthy and well where she is now and I have no doubt she is watching over you. Beautiful post.

Tomes Edition said...

Death is never easy and i pray God helps you through. I'm truly sorry for your loss.

Yewande said...

God will see you through this difficult time. I pray that God almighty will wrap his loving arms around you, comfort you and wipe away every tear. The good thing is that you know your mum is in heaven, rejoicing and one day you will see her again in glory.
P.S: I love your blog. I have been a silent reader for a long time.

Emily Gilbert said...

She was a beautiful person, soul, and spirit. <3 Hugs you.

Dani @ said...

Oh Faith. (HUG) I wish I could give you this in person. (HUG) *muah*

The Mrs./The Mom said...

Prayers of comfort for you!

Mrs. Pancakes said...

Oh gosh heart just broke for you! I didn't know your mom but she seemed to have the most beautiful spirit and soul and it's perfect that that was her fav song! Hugs all day long for you, Sean, your sisters and dad and rest of your family!

Joy B. E. said...

Awww Faith. Be encouraged. I can only imagine what you are going through and pray that you find comfort knowing that you now have an angel by your side all the time.

This is a hard loss and although I never met your mom, I know that she must have been remarkable because she raised an awesome daughter like you.

Remain blessed and praying for God's comforting arms to surround you.

Ashley R said...

Beautiful said, what an amazing lady. <3 <3

Dee said...

Many hugs to you, dear friend. I am deeply sorry for your loss. You were blessed to have such a loving, kind, Godly mother and you are a reflection of the wonderful woman she was. And the memories will indeed be more and more precious... and yet the tears will flow. And let them. The world has lost a wonderful woman, but Heaven has gained an Angel.

God's continued blessings, peace, strength and love for you and your family.

Brandi said...

Oh my goodness, Faith, I'm so very sorry for your loss. I know that your heart is hurting. Mine hurts too for you and your family. I lost my mom and know the pain your feeling. Thinking of you during this most difficult time.

Beauty said...

I just want to say that your Mom was so beautiful and had such a great smile and I am glad that she was born again. She is in heaven right now smiling back at you and you will be all right. I was not able to leave a message in your recent post so, I decided to leave it here.

Have a blessed week.

Melissa @ i carry your heart said...

I'm way behind on reading blogs, clearly, but I could not read this without commenting. I felt every word you wrote. It sounds like your mom was such an amazing woman. I look forward to the day we can both think of our parents we lost without so much pain in our hearts. Take care!

Kacie Ellis said...

I am so sorry for your loss. It makes me tear up just reading your post. You will be in my prayers.

Dana said...

That is a beautiful song. May the knowledge that your mothers body failed her but not her beautiful spirit and soul did not.