Today marks one month without my mom.
I still can't believe she is no longer here but some days are better than others.
I do notice that if I am busy I am much better versus when I'm sitting still with my thoughts.
It's crazy because it feels like my world has stopped but everyone else is moving and I'm stuck on that date.
I can't stop thinking about that heartbreaking day.
But I can already tell that it will get easier with time because I have my lovely sisters, all who have something (look, character, gesture) of my mom that just make me appreciate them more. It has been important for us to check up on each other daily because one day one of us could be doing OK and that same day another one was in tears for hours.
Also, being there for my dad has been important because he lost his best friend and it has not been easy on him. To be honest, it has most likely been the worst for him. Family is so important and if it were possible I love them more today than one month ago and nowadays it has been even more important to say it often.
Life is continuing to go on so we have to move as well but one thing will remain constant for us is that we will keep our mom in our hearts and thoughts for always. I didn't think I could do it but I was able to go one month without my mom.
But I heard her voice because I kept so many of her voice messages that she left me over the years. Birthday, anniversary, Christmas messages and I know they will be so important to have in the next few months. I won't lie and say that listening to her voice messages did not result in me crying my eyes out but for those moments she was there and that's priceless to me.
Mom, we love and miss you and know you're having an incredible time dancing with Jesus ♥
I still can't believe she is no longer here but some days are better than others.
I do notice that if I am busy I am much better versus when I'm sitting still with my thoughts.
It's crazy because it feels like my world has stopped but everyone else is moving and I'm stuck on that date.
I can't stop thinking about that heartbreaking day.
But I can already tell that it will get easier with time because I have my lovely sisters, all who have something (look, character, gesture) of my mom that just make me appreciate them more. It has been important for us to check up on each other daily because one day one of us could be doing OK and that same day another one was in tears for hours.
Also, being there for my dad has been important because he lost his best friend and it has not been easy on him. To be honest, it has most likely been the worst for him. Family is so important and if it were possible I love them more today than one month ago and nowadays it has been even more important to say it often.
Life is continuing to go on so we have to move as well but one thing will remain constant for us is that we will keep our mom in our hearts and thoughts for always. I didn't think I could do it but I was able to go one month without my mom.
But I heard her voice because I kept so many of her voice messages that she left me over the years. Birthday, anniversary, Christmas messages and I know they will be so important to have in the next few months. I won't lie and say that listening to her voice messages did not result in me crying my eyes out but for those moments she was there and that's priceless to me.
Mom, we love and miss you and know you're having an incredible time dancing with Jesus ♥
This post made me so happy, seeing you all together surrounding your dad with so much love and support. I remember when you had a photoshoot down this same alley and your mom was there.
ReplyDeleteLife is something, I know your mom is dancing with Jesus and smiling at your crazy faces here on earth :)
Prayers for you Faith. I am glad you and the family are getting together and rallying around each other.
ReplyDeleteOh Faith...
ReplyDeleteI pray that you and your family find the peace and healing you need.
Hugs to you.
I kept a video of my grandmother from last thanksgiving where she was telling us to live everyday like it was our last because everyone wouldn't be here forever. I haven't been brave enough to watch it yet. But I look forward to seeing and hearing her voice again when I'm strong enough to handle it. It definitely feels like time stopped. We really do need to keep steady at moving forward.
ReplyDeleteThis post made me smile. Yes, your mom left a legacy behind. No doubt.
ReplyDeleteThis post made me smile. Yes, your mom left a legacy behind. No doubt.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you! And I totally know what you mean about loving your family now more than ever. It truly brings you closer going through something like that. I have some videos of my dad with my kids that I've been watching because they definitely bring me comfort. I love hearing my dad's voice and the funny things he used to say. I know everyone grieves differently, though. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you are all staying in contact with one another daily, especially your father. You all are such a beautiful and loving family, I know your mom is proud.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you have your family to support you during this difficult time! Still praying for you BIG!
ReplyDeleteSo glad you have your family to support you during this difficult time! Still praying for you BIG!
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful and strong family. This was so touching. God is with you every step of the way.
ReplyDeleteWhat a loving and beautiful family! So glad you have each other for love and support!
ReplyDeleteIt probably feels like an eternity even though it's only been one month. No matter what, you have each other to lean on and help each other through it and that is a wonderful thing.
ReplyDelete